one of my last belly photos at 39 weeks, i was down to one pair of pants that fit!
andy picked me up for our 12 o'clock, 40 week appointment with dr. delrosario (aka dr. del), a doctor we had never had before. the past 40 weeks were so fun having these appointments to look forward to sharing with andy. one of my favorite memories from my pregnancy for sure. after introducing himself, dr. del began the check up with listening to our baby boy's heart beat–music to our ears at every appointment. then he took my belly measurement and began the internal exam to check my progress. the most painful exam of them all! i didn't know it at the time, but my membranes had been scraped during the exam, the culprit of the pain and discomfort. also the culprit that sent me into labor, but we will get to that later!
once the exam was complete, andy and i were informed i was 2 cm dilated, almost 100% effaced and at 0 station. because we liked dr. del, andy and i asked him when he would be at the hospital (our usual question for the doctors/midwives that we saw each week that we hoped would deliver our son). dr. del's response caught us off guard when he said, "i'll be there tonight and saturday. but i won't be delivering your son. i am very confident you will have this baby tomorrow. i may be the one to do his circumcision on saturday, but i won't be delivering him." uhh, what?!
in shock, we thanked him as he left the exam room. i immediately started crying. i was overwhelmed. how was it possible that i woke up that morning feeling like i was going to be pregnant forever, to only a few short hours later being told our baby would be here in 24 hours. it was a lot to process, but i mean the whole idea of a baby growing inside of me was a lot to process–it nearly took me 9 months to get used to the idea of it and now i loved it. i wasn't ready for it to be over just yet. but at the same time i couldn't wait to hold our baby in my arms. finally.
andy hugged me and assured me it would all be okay. i was afraid of labor and really wasn't mentally prepared for it yet. the unknown is always scary and labor and delivery is one of those unknowns that you already know won't feel good and will most likely involve some sort of pain and hard work. my mind was racing and i needed distractions.
so, once we left and got into the car, we called my mom and sister and told them the latest update. andy asked if i wanted to stop and get lunch or needed anything, and all i could think of is how for the last week i really wanted to buy a new spring wreath for our front door. so, to michael's we went to buy a new wreath. while walking around the store, looking for the perfect spring wreath, i started to feel really uncomfortable and crampy. i found a wreath and was ready to get back home.
andy had to get back to work to wrap up some things, but was coming home in about an hour to spend the rest of the day and evening with me. to keep my mind distracted yet again, i started baking and cooking. i made andy cookies and cooked breaded chicken breasts and rice for dinner. my mind was distracted for the time during andy's absence, but not for long.
when andy got back home, i was starting to feel even more uncomfortable and crampy. i knew i needed to prepare myself, because if dr. del was accurate in his prediction, i would need to be well rested, hydrated and fueled for labor and delivery the next day. so i grabbed my beloved water bucket (the "troft," as andy calls it, i drank from throughout pregnancy to stay super hydrated everyday) and tried to relax on the couch and take a nap.
i couldn't sleep, because my discomfort started to intensify. at the time i wasn't sure if it was from the exam or if it was the onset of contractions, so i tried to stay calm and watch some tv on the couch with andy. around 6 pm, my mom stopped by with my step-dad to drop off a plate of eggplant parmesan she had made the night before. only minutes after they arrived i felt my first contraction. it was long and i just knew it was the real thing.
we began to time the contractions, which had a pattern of coming on every 5 - 8 minutes and lasted for 60 seconds each time. i knew i needed to get a good meal in so i ate the chicken and rice i had cooked earlier, but i could barely eat with the increase in contractions.
i thought maybe a warm shower might feel good, so after dinner i took one to get ready for bed. once i climbed in bed, the contractions intensified to the point of not being able to talk through them. it was then that i said to andy that we might need to go to the hospital. andy suggested i call our ob's office to double check with them first, and once i reached someone at the hospital (during office after hours you are directed to the hospital), another contraction started. i had to ask the woman on the phone to please wait a minute while i made it through the contraction. once i got back to her on the phone, without hesitation she told us to come in.
it was about 9 p.m. at this point, and andy jumped into his supportive birth partner role immediately. i dried my hair while andy gathered our bags (which i might add had been packed since 32 weeks, andy had a few things to gather in his last minute...no big surprise there!) and packed the car. we put winslow in his crate and made our way to the car. we had a plan set with my aunt to take winslow to the kennel in the morning, and i cried knowing i wouldn't see him for at least a week, he is my first baby after all!
as we made our way to the hospital, i held andy's hand, thinking of the reality of this all...we could be on our way to meet our baby. such a surreal realization.
we weren't sure if this was going to be the real deal or a false alarm, so we made calls to our parents and siblings only, and said we would update them if we get admitted. the weather forecast was calling for the biggest snow fall of the winter to begin that night, so we didn't want anyone driving when it wouldn't be necessary.
when we arrived, andy walked me into the emergency room, but had to run back out to our car to park it, so i was wheeled up to the labor and delivery floor without him. i pretty much cried the whole way there until andy was back at my side. we were taken to a room to be examined to find out my progress and look at mine and the baby's vitals. my contractions were all in my back, so having to lay in bed was not easy.
our nurse, lynn, was as sweet as can be, an older woman who was welsh, and very much reminded me of my mother in law. as we waited for the midwife, gae rumor, my sister arrived but was not allowed to come back to the room with us. gae came to perform one of many progress internal exams. we were shocked and i was disappointed when she informed us i was 2 cm, 90% effaced and -2 station. for those who aren't familiar with this lingo, basically my progress from earlier that day had reversed and moved backwards. my contractions were so intense i couldn't imagine going home, but if i didn't progress in the next two hours when gae would come back to check me at midnight, i would not be far enough along to be admitted.
i did not want that to be my fate, so andy, my sister and i made our way to the halls. i walked, did lunges and squats, anything to make my progress move further along. i was in a hospital gown with a sheet wrapped around my back to hide my bum, moaning my way through the pain. the only relief i had during the contractions was when andy squeezed my hips, to take the pressure off of my back. when i felt a contraction coming i would yell, "squeeze me!"
at midnight andy and i made our way back to my exam room. our nurse came back shortly after we returned, and i broke down. i told her i was a failure and if i was sent home i just didn't know what i would do. with every contraction i would take big deep breaths in and moan incredibly loud with every breath out. the intensity just kept growing with each contraction, i needed motivation, good news to keep me going. so when gae finally checked me and told us i was 5 cm and i was going to be having a baby, i just burst into tears of relief. andy kissed my head and just continued to encourage me, telling me how proud he was of me. i was brought a wheelchair again and transported to my own room.
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